Overwhelming Chaos Chapter 38042740274024
To say I'm just sad and too tired is an understatement, to play this mom of an autistic 8 year old is overwhelming not to mention I have another toddler that eats up all the energy I have. Sometimes I sit and wonder how people can do all the things they like without anyone needing them, how they be able to sit in silence sipping coffee while reading books, writing stories and having adult conversations I haven't had in years.
I know I ask for these things but someohow I end up living in my chaos with the never ending list of things to do, the overstimulating noises I try to drown throughout these years, those dreams I buried behind me, I know some people will say Oh you will miss it someday yeah well fuvked I know somehow I won’t, I might probably worry about it till my grave. What an unfortunate 360 degree turned of events. What a sick joke to play on anyone, some might say this should have been a nightmare but it doesn’t fuckin end: yeah how great was that, my body and mind screams for some quiet. I'm definitely playing the hero on this story and I'm desperately needs saving just for a day but I'm not gonna ask for it,nope, I'm too proud of myself. I'll just scretly whisper it hoping the universe can hear me.
Goodnight.